!DOCTYPE html PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD XHTML 1.0 Strict//EN" "http://www.w3.org/TR/xhtml1/DTD/xhtml1-strict.dtd"> pegasus horse cake.: erm

26.2.06

erm

lo and behold!
the story of possibly-one-of-the-most-annoying-strangers-on-earth!
yesterday i waited an hour (thank you easyjet for your consistent delays) for my brother to confusedly wheel his suitcase out of the magical doors of arrivals. during that hour, i stood quite still against the metal bars in stoic acceptance of lost time.
after a few minutes, i realized a man had claimed the space next to me.
not that i cared. it's a free airport.
what i did care about was his noisy whistly breathing.
hissssss huzzzzzz hissssssss huzzzzzzzzz hissssssss huzzzzzzzzz.
this was constant.
i stole a glance. he was young. no obvious breathing problems. i thought of offering him a tissue or something to unblock his nose and hopefully put a stop to the hissing.
i thought i was being ridiculously fussy, 'the man needs to breathe'.
until the pacing started.
he paced. he breathed noisily. he paced some more. he leaned against the bars and breathed.
cue to the face rubbing.
he paced. he breathed. he rubbed his faced. he breathed. he rubbed his face again. he paced. more face rubbing.
'stop being so hypersensitive' i told myself.
and so he decided to crack his knuckles. i swear this was a test of my patience. images of eroding joints and premature arthrosis accompanied by the 'crock... crocky-crock... click' invaded my mind. i hate hate hate knuckle cracking. it's cringing.
hissssss huzzzzzzz hisssssss huzzzzzzzz
crockittycrockcrackclick
pace pace pace pace
face rubby face rubby
cracky crocky clicky
pace pace pace and then some
crock-o-rama
then i thought the only thing that could help this man was some valuum, or a five mile court order from caffeine. or at least give this poor man some gum to chew, for crissakes.
but then he started to look sideways at me every five or so minutes.
that was it.
i left and stood a few meters away, should have done this in the first place.

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